Friday, October 10, 2008

The Kind Of Town We Live In

Here is an example of the kind of town we live in. These are the things that made the August news:


8-2-08 At 9:30 AM a resident reported a wallet stollen from an unlocked car. At 11 AM a resident reported ATV tracks on his property.

8-4-08 At 10:15 AM a resident reoprted that a CD case had been taken from his car the night before. There were four homes whose occupants reported doorbells being rung between 3:30 AM and 4 AM, with some reporting property damage.

8-6-08 At 10:30 AM a resident reported plant and yard items missing.

8-7-08 A resident reported golf clubs missing. The resident was unsure when the clubs disappeared and said they may have fallen from a golf cart.

8-8-08 At 11:45 AM there was a collision. There were no injuries, and the drivers exchanged information.

8-11-08 At 12:30 PM a resident reported that a canoe had been stolen. At 3:15 PM another resident reported that 8 to 10 gallons of gasoline was stolen out of his car's gas tank.

8-12-08 The garbage truck operator reported that house paint had been thrown away in someone's trash and was now leaking onto the road.

8-13-08 At 9;30 AM a resident stopped at the Security office to report that an older man was walking along the road near the campground area with a stick in his hand. As cars would approach he would hold the stick out onto the road and cause the cars to swerve to miss the stick.

8-14-08 At 1 PM a resident reported suspicious activity at her home the night before. Security went to the area but found no one.

8-15-08 The same resident from the previous report again reported suspicious activity outside her house at 1:30 AM. Security went to the area and found suspicious activity at another location on the same street that turned out to be an underage drinking party. The Sheriff's Deputy on duty took over the situation. The resident was fined a flagrant violation.

8-16-08 The clubhouse recieved a report of boys on the golf course with BB guns. Security ent to the location but was unable to locate anyone fitting the description.

8-18-08 Damage to the golf course was reported in the area of No. 6 hole. More than 15 holes were punched into the green, the water fountain was broken, and the irrigation controller was damaged.

8-19-08 The garbage truck operator reported that gasoline had been thrown away in someone's trash and was now leaking onto the roads.

8-24-08 Homeland Security, the Secret Service and the Sheriff's Office responded to the air strip for an airplane that flew into restricted airspace. The situation was quickly resolved.

8-26-08 At 9:30 AM the garbage truck operator reported that three different colors of paint were leaking onto the roads, after which he was told to fix the hole in his truck. (Okay, I'll admit that I made up that last part!)


1 comment:

Leah said...

You're funny! I totally fell for the hole in the truck line. :)